Monday, February 20, 2006
8:25 pm
Hey...I'm sorry if you read the previous entry (that I just deleted)...I was pretty angry when I wrote it and just reading it again made me wonder if it was me! So yea...that's over and done with...please don't ask me about it and if you have, I'm really sorry but I can't talk about it.
ANYWAY.
I get to skip a whole day of school tomorrow to debate at UTS! Which is good, but bad since I've never debated before and they put me in a team anyway! I'm kinda scared but I hope I'll pick it up by my second debate (debating three times tomorrow). After debating I will have to hurry back to Sydney Girls for mock trial. Busy day indeed. I will be dead beat when I get home.
It feels like a much longer time has passed since yesterday, when I walked into church (late) for band practice, feeling horrible. Because something good happened then, and since good things are hard to sustain, they feel like they've been going on for longer. You know, just like it feels like forever when you're studying, except it really hasn't been.
Steve didn't preach last night, no one did really. We just had Matthew, who was back from the Czech Republic, come and tell us his story...didn't plan for it, but it took up pretty much the whole sermon time. I don't know why what he was saying meant anything to me at all, since usually whatever christians do abroad seem really irrelevant to me...just...not real to me. But last night, something in what he was saying was really speaking to me. It was like revelation, I suddenly realised what I'd been doing wrong, how selfish I'd really been, what I'm actually meant to be doing with my life...
It's crazy, isn't it, how some people can walk into your life and change it irreversibly in a matter of minutes...and then leave again. God knew what I was looking for, even when I didn't.