Tuesday, December 02, 2003
11:59 pm
hey. darn half the hols are over!!! and i won't be doing touching that shit load of work this week (just like all the other weeks) cos i've got camp on wed, the sec 4 farewell camp, and from thursday to sunday, the ym camp. oh yeah...so the sec4 farewell camp isn't really a camp, cos i'm not staying over, but :P
plus: news update - australia.
looks like i really might go next yr man. got another email from the person from the sch there saying i might get a place. but now my parents figure they can't move there so fast with me which means that if i go, i'll have to board for a semester. which is half a year. you know, i used to think boarding was perfectly fine. it'd solve my loneliness. give me people to talk to. workmates. studymates. and then i thought about it again. no privacy. no beloved door to lock. everyone needs to be alone sometime.
and, (if i'm not wrong) they turn the lights out at 10, which i seriously think is MADNESS. i mean,
hello? who can manage to sleep at TEN?! especially if you always have pangs of insomnia, like me. or if you have just moved there, and would be missing everyone too badly to fall asleep, which will
probably be like me. earlier this year i thought i had absolutely nothing to miss here. and now when things have just started to turn around a
little, i'll probably be going, and i'll have things to miss. damn you can't have the best of both worlds.
but i think i'm still quite inclined on going. like 75-25 "yes i wanna go." i'm getting very sick of this 24hour-rushed-life and i think it will do me good to start over, and start slower. plus, i suppose the boarding thing will be good experience. i could do with managing my own stuff for a change, even if it means i have a bit less time. besides there are already some of yall here in singapore who already have to do your own housework and stuff rite? which means i'm like the spoilt brat who thinks having to do it is a big deal. haha. the little brat has to grow up sometime. :P and the boarding thing will only be half a year. it may be a
slow half a year but heck - i'll live. haha
now the only thing i'm waiting for is that confirmed green light. it's so irritating when you feel you're all for it and then that light turns amber on you. and - if my place isn't confirmed sooner, to let me know whether or not i'm going, knowing the procrastinator i am i'll just assume i'm going and not do that shit load of holiday homework. but then - what if i don't get the place? i'll be so screwed. haha. but then i suppose whether or not i'm going i should still do all of it like a good little girl right? *sigh* it's hard being good. haha.